HEY QUEEN OF MEAN FANS! LEGENDARY NETWORK, HBO, SIGNS LISA TO PILOT DEAL!

It's a match made in heaven -- the edgiest comic out there and the edgiest network EVER! That's right! HBO has signed Lisa Lampanelli to star in, executive produce, and co-create a series. Due in HUGE part to comedic genius/box-office wonder, Jim Carrey, who took Lisa under his wing when he saw her at Los Angeles' Wiltern Theatre nearly a year ago, the deal with the pay network was announced Friday in Variety.

For the entire scoop, go to:
http://tinyurl.com/5275fq

LISA SIGNED TO BOOK DEAL WITH HARPER COLLINS

The Queen of Mean's got an opinion on EVERYTHING, and Harper Collins, one of the leading book publishers in the world, wants to hear them all. So, the publishing giant has signed Lisa to a deal for her first book, "The World According to Lisa: The Queen of Mean's Guide to the Universe." Check out their press release below:

Collins Inks Deal With "Comedy's Lovable Queen Of Mean"

New York, NY - CollinsPublishers today announced a major deal with Grammy-nominated comedian Lisa Lampanelli for a collection of her jaw-dropping, politically incorrect rants and observations. THE WORLD ACCORDING TO LISA: The Queen of Mean's Guide to the Universe, to be published in Fall '09, will provide Lampanelli's take on relationships, parenting, fitness, minority groups, religion, and every subject in between. Insult comedian Lampanelli, who is quick to poke fun at her own physical and moral imperfections, has an opinion on every subject under the sun, which is sure to make for a hilarious read.

The New York Times said Lampanelli "talks like a truck driver but resembles a '50s housewife in her pearls, shirtwaist dresses and button-down sweaters." Lampanelli, a former journalist who in May sold out Carnegie Hall for her debut performance there, began her stand-up career in New York in the early '90s and is a frequent guest on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, The Howard Stern Show, and on Comedy Central.

Asked if perhaps this book is an attempt to become part of the literary community, Lampanelli is quick to say, "You bet your ass it is! I'm a classy broad! First, The New York Times, then Carnegie Hall, now a book deal. I'm like Charlotte from Sex and the City -- if Charlotte dated black guys and said the C-word a lot."

HEY QUEEN OF MEAN FANS! CHECK LISA OUT SUNDAY NIGHT WHEN SHE ROASTS GENE SIMMONS OF KISS FAME ON HIS A&E SHOW, "GENE SIMMONS' FAMILY JEWELS!"

That's right! The air date is finally here. Watch this Sunday, June 15th, when Lisa is among the few 'n the proud to roast musician, father, and shameless self-promoter Gene Simmons.

Tune into A&E at 9:30 p.m. EST to watch the pre-roast telecast and don't touch that dial at 10 p.m. when the official roast gets underway. Joining Lisa in roasting Gene to a crisp are her buddies Paul Mooney, Danny Bonaduce, and Howard Stern regular Craig Gass.

Set your TiVO for this one, folks. It's one you won't wanna miss!

HEY HARDCORE QUEEN OF MEAN FANS! GET YOUR TICKETS FOR LISA'S SHOW IN SANTA ROSA, CA!

Check Lisa out when she makes her triumphant return to one of her favorite venues EVER, beyotches!

On Friday, November 21, the Queen of Mean will invade the Wells Fargo Center for the Arts in gorgeous Santa Rosa, CA. Lisa's last show in this theatre sold out in a flash, so you'll want to grab your tickets now!

PLAY THE DATING GAME WITH LISA ON HOWARD 101! IS THE QUEEN OF MEAN ALSO YOUR QUEEN OF HEARTS?

You know Lisa -- lucky in everything but love. So, Howard 101 has come to the rescue. On Lisa's one-hour special on Howard 101 on Monday, May 12th, at 7 p.m., Lisa will be conducting her search for the perfect chocolate daddy.

Think you're a match for Lisa? Then e-mail your photo to
DateLisa@sirius-radio.com.

Contestants chosen must be:
a) Black
b) Black
c) Available to come to Sirius Satellite Radio studios in New York City on Monday, May 12th, for the broadcast; and
d) Did we mention? Black.

If you've got a good sense of humor and wouldn't mind sharing a plate of chicken 'n waffles with the Queen of Mean, send in your photo to DateLisa@sirius-radio.com. You just might be plucked from obscurity and make it to the final three.

HEY, QUEEN OF MEAN AND KING OF ALL MEDIA FANS! TUNE IN YOUR SIRIUS SATELLITE RADIO ON MONDAY, MAY 12TH, FOR A DOUBLE DOSE OF LL!!

That's right! Lisa will be appearing on her hero's show -- Howard Stern, of course -- on Monday, May 12th, at 8:30 a.m. EST, discussing everything from her upcoming show at Carnegie Hall to her Grammy anger to the NFL player backlash from her last appearance on Howard. So, switch on Howard 100 at 8:30 a.m. on Monday, May 12th. You'll kick yourself if you don't.

And as if that weren't enough, Lisa will be hosting her first one-hour special on Howard 101 that very same evening at 7 p.m. EST. Following in the footsteps of her buddies Andy Dick and Greg Fitzsimmons, Lisa will occupy a full hour of airtime on the station that made Bubba the Love Sponge a household name.

Listen in as Lisa conducts her on-air search for the perfect black man, or as she likes to call it, "Moolie Matchmaker." One year after dating whitey, Lisa is back to the blacks, and will hopefully be successful in her search for the perfect chocolate daddy. Tune in at 7 p.m. on the 12th, for a show you'll never forget.

CATCH LISA LIVE ON SIRIUS SATELLITE RADIO WHEN SHE VISITS HER BUDDY, BUBBA THE LOVE SPONGE, NEXT THURSDAY, APRIL 24!

Don't forget to tune your Sirius radio dials to Howard 101 next Thursday, April 24, when Lisa will make her first IN-STUDIO appearance on the Bubba the Love Sponge show in nearly a year. Listen in at 3:30 p.m. EST when no subject will be taboo with Lisa, Bubba, Spice, Brent, and the rest of the crew. As an added bonus: The boys have promised to find Lisa the perfect black man, so trust us, you're not gonna want to miss THAT!